Day #13 - 10/28/97 - 1:34PM

You see this? ..II finally got into USA Today and all it took was losing my job. Yesterday, 10/27/97, the USA TODAY Hot Sites column featured my diary entries as a "Hot Site". Had I known this was all I needed to get some free national publicity, I would have tried to get myself fired long ago! I can see it now: first a blurb in USA TODAY and next? Who knows? The major magazines will probably be camping at my doorstep, begging to do a feature story on my unemployment. I might become the most unemployed Radio Personality in the country! Then, if I play my cards right....I can make a living as a guest on talk shows talking about how unemployed I am!

Just in case any magazines want to do a feature story (yeah, look at me holding my breath...) I've decided to write possible headlines they can use for them:

"National Enquirer" - "Papparazzi Blamed In DJ's Tragic End"

"The Star" - "Deitz Admits: Two-headed Beast Talking Out The Side Of Both Mouths Discovered in Program Director's Office Right Before Firing"

"Time" - "Unemployed Man of The Year"

"Good Housekeeping" - "Inside: Corey Deitz Reveals 13 Frank & Beans Holiday Recipes"

"Playgirl" - "Off-Air but On-Fire: A Second DJ Goes Public With His Private Parts"

"TV GUIDE" - "What's On? Ask Corey! He Has Time To Watch Everything!"