Day #53 - 12/06/97 - 6:00PM
I just got off the road a couple of hours ago after traveling almost 1,000 miles -by car- between 8pm last night and 4:30pm today. (Slept 3 hours between 2:30 and 5:30am at a rest stop and wasn't mugged!)
Alright, here's the deal. I had a job offer to do mornings and be the Operations Manager at a CHR. I'd rather not mention the market or station because I have a great amount of respect for the people who wanted me to work for them and think they should be afforded privacy here.
Anyway, It was a great offer, financially and for stability. I accepted (after much anguish over splitting from Jay), and drove out there on Tuesday/Wednesday of this week. Maybe I should have thought it through more. Maybe I panicked and jumped too soon. When you're a father and husband, your first goal is to "provide".
So, what happened? Something I have never done before: I rescinded my availability for the position. (Cool phrase, huh? I just made it up.) You know: I decided not to take it.
Why? Well, sometimes things look better on paper than they do when you see them up close. But, there's more. On my drive out, I brought along a bunch of old air-checks of Jay and I from Q94 in Richmond and WLTF in Cleveland. I found myself laughing and crying at the same time. It brought to the surface what I knew deep inside anyway: I don't enjoy being on the radio with anyone else more than with Jay Hamilton. We're so much less separately, so much more together. As fate would have it, I hadn't actually signed the contract yet that was in front of me.
I walked.
I had to. After a couple of days in the new city, my stomach just went into knots. My head kept saying, "Don't worry....this will work out." But, my psyche was saying, "Big mistake. Get out while you can." So, I did. My only regret is for the folks who offered me the job. I didn't mean to come and go like that. I didn't know I was going to feel the way I did. To those folks: thank you for your courtesy and faith and good luck to you.
In the meantime, Corey & Jay are still a team. We're always going
to be a team. Jay is the funniest person I know. There's no use doing a
radio show if I can't do it with him. I love the guy.